Searching for Fiction
by EdwardPassion
Summary: Ever wonder what would happen to Bella if Edward, the Cullens, or even forks was all just a dream? Well, come read my story and find out. First Chapter just posted!
1. Goodbyes

"I don't -," His voice wavered as his eyes stayed trained on my shoes, "I don't love you anymore."

Right as he said these words my heart fell to the cold, wet, leaf covered ground and disappeared. My eyes started searching his face for any trace of regret in his choice of words. Nothing. His stony expression remained emotionless as his topaz eyes darted towards my pained face and quickly returned to my muddy shoes. His hair was as auburn as ever and it blew in the wind, faintly, making him look like a true greek god, just like that day, in the meadow.

It all reminded me of the worst day of my life, which just happens to be exactly one year ago, ... today. He had said these same heartbreaking words that day and left me in the woods. Unfortunately, Sam and his pack had found me before I died in the exact place, Edward had left me, huddled in a ball, crying from the excruciatingly painful deployment of my heart. I now wished that Sam had left me to rot to death. It would have been much more painless.

Edward had promised me that leaving me was all just a huge mistake after he had come back. He thought he was helping me when he left. I guess that all those words were a lie, so what would make this time any different? Is he trying to keep me safe or does he truly not love me?

I looked up at him and started speaking, "Edward, What about las -"

Edward cut me off in mid-sentence and began talking, "Bella, don't make this harder for me than it already is." He spoke these words slowly, as if trying to make me understand all of this nonsense. His eyes still trained on my shoes. My blood started pulsing through me faster and faster increasing my heart rate at dangerous speeds.

"What?! Harder for you? You're the one whose leaving me! _AGAIN_! Do you even know how much I've given up for you? When we told Charlie we were getting married, he went crazy and kicked me out! Where am I going to live now? Oh, and did you remember you gave your existence to me? You proposed to _ME_! You committed the rest of your life to me. What happened there? You promised this would never happen again! Do you even care about my well-being?" I stopped. Tears were filling to the brim of my lower lashes. I tilted my head back to keep the tears from falling. I quickly wiped the tears away and stared at him. He still wasn't looking at me. I looked away quickly as he peeked up at me and then returned to his normal state, staring at my shoes.

"Bella, Charlie will take you back in. I already went to him and said the wedding wasn't going to happen. He was thrilled and doesn't know about this, right now. I'm sorry Bella, but we can't live like this. All I can say is that you're human. I - I am a monster. Always will be, Bella. I AM NOT TURNING YOU INTO A MONSTER. You understand? I won't let you live like this and I'm through with dealing... with this." Edward turned his face from my view. He was no longer staring, constantly like a statue, at my shoes. He finally turned his back from me and stood there not moving a muscle.

"EDWARD ANTHONY MASEN CULLEN," I screamed so loudly the trees actually shook and it made Edward actually jump from surprise. He still didn't look at me so I began to talk, 'You look me in the eyes and tell me you don't love me at all, nor have you ever loved me. Tell me it was all a big lie and that you are willing to leave me here with Jacob Black again. Because, guess what? He actually loves me. You know that, right? He'll take advantage of the fact that you left me again. Jacob will be there for me, seeing as you supposedly _don't_ love me. After a few months of grieving over you, Jacob's warm embrace will be comforting, so comforting that I'll end up going to him for everything and he'll sit there, holding me, and listen to me as I pour my broken heart out. Guess what happens next, Edward? I'll end up falling for him! Only because I won't remember what it felt like to actually love someone truthfully. Someone who I really trusted with my heart because then, I'll remember that one day, on a whim, that that someone just decides to rip my heart out, for the second time. Guess who that someone is? You,"

My breathing got heavier as my voice grew stronger, even scaring me. Edward started turning towards me, slowly I continued, "You know what? Jacob was right from the beginning. I should've never trusted you when you came back. He knew this would happen. He knew it, Edward, Jacob knew. I should've listened to him. You are a just a ... bloodsucker. You never even had a heart to give me in the first place so why was I so foolish to trust you with mine."

As those last two sentences were out of my mouth I regretted it. That was NOT something, Bella Swan would say, especially to Edward Cullen! My anger had taken over me. How could I say something like that to my Edward? The love of my life? The only one who cared for me? I knew I had hit some kind of weakness in Edward, that I had never known he had because he did something so out of character. He turned around to stare at me with a horror stricken face. He started backing up to get away, but he didn't notice the tree log behind him and he fell over it. He should've noticed it. Edward was still the most gracefully human being I've known. How could this have happened? He actually started to whimper and the look on his face scared me to death.

I walked over to him and was so shocked that I had said those things. My whole body was shaking. He just sat there over the log that he had fallen over and didn't move. His whimpers grew louder into growls. I tried to apologize, "Edward, I didn't mean that. Edward, I'm so sorry! Please, forgive me. It just slipped out. Please! _Please_, Edward I love you. I mean it! Oh no, what have I done?"

Edward stood up wobbling all over and shaking uncontrollably. "No need for- for apologies. I now know what your thoughts truly are and I only wish I would've been able to hear your true thoughts earlier and save me this embarrassment. Isabella, I'm sorry I was a waste of your time. I never wanted to do this to hurt you, believe me . But seeing as you would be happier with Jacob Black, I will be a civilized monster and be on my way without another word." His words pierced the spot where my heart was and left a bigger whole. The worst feeling crashed over me and I fell down and let the tears stream down my face.

The very last words out of his mouth were, "I love you Bella Swan-Cullen, and always will."

A/N oooooohhh! I'm so sorry to leave it at this. but it seemed perfect. urgg. Anyways, I'm also sorry for the out of character Bella. haha. She just needed to have one of those moments where she lets out her feelings that aren't really her feelings. if you get what i mean.

anyways this is my first fanfic so please REVIEW! i need some pointers. thanks again.


	2. Sweet Dreams

Edward turned and ran off in the opposite direction we had came. I just stood there for two minutes staring blankly into the unknown until I realized what had just happened. 

I finally came to my senses and tried going after him even if it was a lost cause because there was no way I could catch him.

"Edward! Don't leave me here! I love you!" I was running into the forest as fast as I could run. I was lost and running in circles. The trees all looked the same. The smell of the damp forest floor was all the same. When I had finally stopped to catch my breath I noticed I was in the meadow. Our meadow. I suddenly fell to my knees and let the tears fall. I cried so hard realizing I was all alone with no one to help me.

"Stupid human needs!" I yelled up to the sky, I have to find him! I knew it was useless and I was alone once again. I just cried my heart out right there in the meadow.

It continued like that for hours until I heard a faint and distant snap of a twig.

"E-Edward? Is that you? Please, I really didn't mean to say those things they- they just slipped out!" I turned my head every which direction to see where the sound had originated from, but there was no one to be seen. I laid my head back down, thinking it was just an animal or something.

"What's wrong, Bella Swan? Did your fiance leave his precious, _delectable_ , Isabella?" The voice came from the edge of the forest. I had heard it somewhere before. I stared at the place where it had came from and suddenly there was a girl's figure walking out from among the shadows and stopped just at the very edge of the darkness. Then all of a sudden, it hit me. Victoria.

"S-Show yourself!" I wiped the tears from my eyes and yelled not caring what my tragic fate would be here in this meadow. Edward was gone and for good all because of me and my stupid mouth. He wouldn't be coming back anytime soon.

"You poor, lonely human. I only wish Edward were here to watch... you... die," Victoria lunged herself towards me from behind a tree and I just stood there with my eyes tightly closed, bracing myself for the inevitable impact of Victoria's body on mine, but it never happened. There was no boom. There was no crash. No colliding bodies of a strong vampire seeking revenge and a useless human searching for her lost love.

When I opened my eyes, I was looking straight at her snarling face, "Stupid humans. They always think I want to automatically kill them. You were always predictable though, dearest one. Bella, you of all people, should know I love to play with my appetizers first."

I looked her straight in the eye. Her eyes were pitch black and I could see the slightest speck of red in her irises. She was thirsty and very angry. Awaiting revenge of her sweet, dead mate, James. I just chuckled at the thought.

"Just go ahead and kill me, Victoria. There's no need for play time. Edward's not coming back anytime soon, not after what I said." A single tear rolled down my cheek as I said this last sentence. It made everything seem to final.

"Now, what happened between you and oh, uhmm, Edward?" She paused for a second. For a dramatic effect I suppose. "I think that he will come back. I mean it was what I had planned. Maybe he won't come back for a year or so, but eventually he will realize how alone he is without you. He will come back seeking forgiveness and try to win you back. Oh, how this thought sickens me. Ugh. Anyways, he won't find you. He will panic and search everywhere. Suddenly, he will realize that you no longer exist in Forks. Edward will assume that you fled after that little fight and that you ran off to Jacksonville to see your dear mother." She stopped talking, eyeing me up and down. She let a small laugh escape her perfectly pursed lips.

"This was all so worth it. How could this not be perfect?! Edward will feel deep pain, just as I had for my beloved James, and attempt to find you, but won't succeed. You see, Bella? You will be gone, nonexistent, dead. Oh, and all because of my little chat with your fiance. This is just too easy." Victoria lifted her hands up to the sky as it thundered and roared with such power and fierceness that it scared me to death. I stared at her mocking face and suddenly felt so woozy I fell to my knees. My head was bowed and my hair was wet and matted across my face.

"W-What do you mean, you're little chat with Edward?" The words escaped my mouth as my brain searched for any trace of an answer to my question. Could she be the reason that Edward had tried to leave me again? Was he leaving once again only to protect me? This was all too much to take in, all too obvious!

"Oh, yes. I forgot to mention my little chat with your, Edward, didn't I?" She walked towards me and bent down placing her hand under my chin and pulling my face up to look her in the eyes. She then removed the hair from my face to look at me thoroughly. I suddenly felt the urge to spit in her face, but restrained myself from it.

I stood up confidently, while removing her grasp on my chin and started to speak mockingly, "Must have slipped your mind. Why don't you fill me in?" The confidence that surged through me was frightening. I had never felt this confidence before except for when I had first told Edward I loved him.

"Mmm, Where shall I start?" She gawked at my unreadable expression. She was taken aback by my sudden confidence and didn't know how to react. It was all written across her easily read face. I thought I would burst out laughing at any given moment.

"Try the be-gin-ning." I just had to let that one out slowly so she could comprehend. I stared at her worried that my confidence would be worn out too soon.

"Oh, right. Well, first I captured his precious sister, Alice. It was much too easy also. She never saw it coming haha. Then Edward found me and I confronted him about it. I told your fiance that if he didn't leave you then Alice would die and soon after so would you-" She broke off for a moment to flash her sharp teeth at me so as to scare me, but it didn't work.

"Wait-wouldn't Edward- if its just you then Edward wouldn't have just left me like this?" My voice started to waver in and out of my wariness now.

"Well, I'm not alone Bella. I am clever you know. Filthy humans. Ugh. Well, I brought the Troulet clan along. I told them that you were immune to powers and they were interested. They are easy to persuade. You have no idea how strong they are. They could easily hurt all of the Cullens in less than a minute. Anyways, back to Edward. I threatened him and he began to defend his family. Yelling and growling. You know, the usual. That's when Carcus, the Troulet leader, came out and knocked Edward out. He grew tired of Edward's attitude. Once Edward woke he agreed it was best. He made me swear I wouldn't hurt you or Alice. Of course I wouldn't keep my pact. I gave him Alice and then Edward was soon on his way to find you. That's when you called him a bloodsucker, _ya da ya da ya blah blah blah_ and then he left. Awe, yes I was listening in. How, how heartbreaking, I must admit." She finished with her story and that's when I realize Edward didn't fight. He didn't even jump at anyone. He just growled? Or was she leaving the fight out of her story? I had to know.

"So, Edward didn't fight? He didn't even so much as throw a punch?" My head was woozy once again and the confidence that had surged through me just before was completely lost.

"You silly girl. Weren"t you listening to my story? All he did was lose his temper. He growled and maybe gave himself a few scratches, but that was it. Like I said, much too easy." She laughed after this and with swift vampire movements was centimeters away from my face. I could feel her breath on my nose. "You will go through agony, Bella. I will make sure of that. You will suffer, for making me suffer. I hope you know that you will be nonexistent in this life. You will most likely be dead, but not completely."

Her breath had a sweet scent to it that I couldn't detect. Her eyes were ravenous with hunger. They were pitch black with only the slightest specks of red in her irises. There were purple markings under her eyes and her red hair stayed perfect throughout this whole ordeal. She hadn't flinched a muscle since she had moved closer to my face, teeth clenched, and fiercely revealing. I shivered.

I tried to pry my eyes away from her deathly stare as tears started to descend from my lower lashes, but I couldn't. I tried over and over to close my eyes, but it never worked. I was glued. Her eyes suddenly glimmered with a trace of fear but then it was gone and replaced by hunger. The only thing I could do was stare at her eyes. As I stared and the wind whipped around us I saw the tiniest flicker of flames in her pupils. Suddenly it grew bigger as her eyes went completely black. Her eyes were completely black except for those flames that grew bigger and bigger. They were so fascinating I drew my head closer, finally being only able to squint my eyes to see better.

The flames had something or someone in them. I didn't have enough time to see who or what because all of a sudden my feet lifted off the ground and my head felt light. In fact my whole body felt light as if I were flying. Victoria laughed quietly and spoke softly into my ear still holding my gaze, "Sweet Dreams, Bella Swan for they shall be your last in Forks."

Her laughter filled the entire woods as my eyelids grew heavy. I tried to decipher the meaning of her words but was too preoccupied with the longing sensation to just forget everything and sleep forever. Just sleep and dream with now worries or cares in the world. Never wanting to wake up.

Suddenly, I drifted off into an endless sleep with the last words I heard being, "They shall be your last in... Forks."

**A/N: OOohhhmigawd. this chapter kept me up all night. lol. I had to finish it before the next morning because guess what!!! THE THIRD BOOK, ECLIPSE COMES OUT AND I AM GOING TO BE GONE READING IT!!!. oooo0000oooo im soo excited is anybody else? haha. **

**well, review please. this is where i stop asking for reviews. i don't want to be on of those fanfic authors who begggssss for REVIEWS!! you know what i mean lol. okay im stopping byyeee. **

**please review. . it is my first fanfic after all.**


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